Nervous System 101: Your body's response to stressors

Your body is amazing. It is a vehicle that makes you capable, allows you to use your senses, and protects you from harm.

Your nervous system, specifically, exists in part to help you recognize and respond to threats. We often refer to these reactions as fight, flight, fawn, or freeze responses. These responses are inherently good. The problem happens when we get stuck in these responses and can’t get back out of them.

We don’t want to train ourselves out of these responses, but we do want to make sure our bodies are triggering these responses at the right time. Otherwise, we can get stuck in these responses with no strategy on how to come out of them.

It’s not healthy for us to live in a constant state of fight, flight, fawn, or freeze. Our bodies need to be able to come down out of those states and recover. Otherwise, we wind up with tension, pain, and other physical symptoms that make it hard for us to function and feel comfortable on a day-to-day basis.

 

Why do we talk about nervous symptom responses in pelvic floor physical therapy?

Your body can display many symptoms of staying in these responses too long. Often, they manifest in your pelvic floor without you even realizing it.

Many of us hold tension in our hips or our pelvic floor muscles when we’re stressed out. Over time, the muscles get so tired of being held so tight, they malfunction. For example, if you struggle with incontinence, it might be because you’ve never allowed your pelvic floor muscles to just relax. So, they wear out to the point where they can’t help you hold urine like they’re supposed to.

Our pelvic floors also hold onto trauma. There have been studies that show endometriosis is often linked to sexual trauma or abuse. It’s literally your body having a physical response to the trauma a person experiences.

 

A chart that shows the progression of a fight response that reads “Sense a threat. Body tenses. Heart rate and blood pressure increase. Adrenaline dumps into your body. You respond with fight mode.
Here, we’re breaking down each of these four nervous system responses, what they look like, and how we can start learning to recover from them.

What happens in fight mode?

Fight mode is your body telling you it better take swift action in order to keep you safe. Your adrenaline will likely start pumping and you enter a mindset where you’re ready to do whatever it takes to stay alive.

Taking action or “fighting” isn’t always bad. We need to stand up for ourselves and each other, we need to protect our kids from a growling dog, we need to slam on the brakes when a car pulls out in front of us.

The important thing is that we don’t live as if we’re on the verge of a fight all the time.

Examples of fight responses:

  • Jumping in front of something dangerous
  • Screaming or yelling
  • Physical altercation
  • Arguing
  • Over-extending/exerting yourself
  • Slamming on your brakes
  • Preparing your defense 

Checking in with your body after fight mode
After an intense threat, it’s important to take note of your body.

Ask yourself…

  • Am I safe? 
  • Where do I feel tension in my body? 
  • Where do I feel pain in my body? 
  • Does my body still feel on edge?

Gratitude mantras to use after fight mode

  • I am safe.
  • My body defended me. 
  • I am strong and capable. 
  • I deserve to breathe. 
  • I deserve to relax.

Strategies to avoid fight mode when it’s not appropriate
Sitting at the dinner table ready to snap? This might be a time to try to avoid going into full-fledged fight mode.

  • Take deep breaths and step away from the conflict
  • Drink water
  • Do light exercises to get your energy out in a positive way

 

What happens in flight mode?

This is the response that happens when a dangerous threat presents itself and your body tells you to run. Even though flight is the opposite of fight, this response triggers all the same things in your body: tight muscles, elevated heart rate, increased blood pressure, the whole shebang.

This is another tool intended to help us fight off sudden threats. The problem is, a lot of people spend A LOT of time in flight mode. This could be because of trauma, stress, anxiety, or a variety of outside pressures.

Examples of flight responses

  • Running away
  • Hiding
  • Shrinking
  • Avoiding
  • Deflecting
  • Redirecting blame
  • Distracting

Checking in with your body after flight mode
After an intense threat, it’s important to take note of your body.

Ask yourself…

  • Am I safe? 
  • Where do I feel tension in my body? 
  • Where do I feel pain in my body? 
  • Am I still looking over my shoulder? 
  • Does my body still feel like it needs to run and hide?

Gratitude mantras to use after flight mode

  • I am safe.
  • My body knew what to do.
  • I am capable of protecting myself. 
  • I no longer need to hide. 
  • I deserve to rest and be calm.

Strategies to avoid flight mode when it’s not appropriate
Feeling like the only way is to run? Try these strategies to help you re-engage in the moment.

  • Deep breathing 
  • Gratitude journaling to remind you of something positive
  • Drink hot tea or another warm and comforting drink

 

Graphic showing a brain in need of help and deciding which of the four responses to have: fight, flight, fawn, and freeze.

 

What happens in freeze mode?

This response has good intentions of helping us slow down and notice details, but we don’t want to remain in this state of static tension.

Work stress or feeling overwhelmed with tasks and therefore withdrawing, scrolling, etc. are examples of what a freeze response looks like. This results in our nervous system activating everything internally and can lead to overactive muscles, especially in our upper traps and pelvic floor.

Examples of freeze responses:

  • Silent panic
  • Memory-blocking
  • Withdrawing
  • Paralyzing Inability to take action
  • Depression/anxiety

Checking in with your body after freeze mode
After an intense threat, it’s important to take note of your body.

Ask yourself…

  • Am I safe/has the threat been removed? 
  • Where do I feel tension in my body? 
  • Where do I feel pain in my body? 
  • Where do I feel a lack of control or confidence in my body? 
  • Do I believe in myself and my abilities?

Gratitude mantras to use after freeze mode

  • I am safe.
  • My body protected me.
  • I have everything I need inside of me. 
  • I have power over my decisions and my actions. 
  • I deserve to be calm and confident in myself.

Strategies to avoid freeze mode when it’s not appropriate
Feeling like you’re shutting down even though you want to take action? Try these strategies to help you get out of your slump.

  • Move, move, move! Go on a walk, stretch, or do some yoga
  • Focus on your breath
  • Repeat positive affirmations like, “I am controlling what I can and I can handle what’s in front of me.”

 

What happens in fawn mode?

This response isn’t always talked about as much as the others, but it’s so important to recognize. A fawn response is a defense mechanism in which we appease someone else in order to protect ourselves. The most overt example of this is in the case of abuse in which the victim goes along with the abuser or even cares for their abuser in order to increase their own chances of survival.

Other fawn responses are much more subtle but still problematic. We underplay our own needs to our partner so that they’re not inconvenienced. We agree to sex because our partner wants it but it actually causes us discomfort. Or, we minimize our pain because we don’t want the doctor to think we’re exaggerating. All of those are fawn responses that deserve our care and attention.

Examples of fawn responses:

  • Appease
  • Pacify the threat
  • People please
  • Calm or comfort the aggressor
  • Downplay our needs

Checking in with your body after fawn mode
After an intense threat, it’s important to take note of your body.

Ask yourself…

  • Am I safe/has the threat been removed? 
  • Where do I feel tension in my body? 
  • Where do I feel pain in my body? 
  • Am I still afraid? 
  • Is my body already prepared for safety to be taken away?

Gratitude mantras to use after fawn mode:

  • I am safe.
  • My body and mind protected me.
  • I am worthy of love and safety.
  • No one has power over me. 
  • I deserve rest and safety.

Strategies to avoid freeze mode when it’s not appropriate
Need to prepare to be brave and stand up for yourself? These strategies can help you get out of fawn mode.

  • Take up physical space by standing in a power stance with your hands on your hips and your feet wide and firm on the ground. Think “superhero” pose. 
  • Bring research or questions to a situation where you feel like the underdog to improve your confidence.
  • Try a grounding practice (outside in the fresh air is even better)

 

Continuing to learn and heal from your nervous system responses

The mantras and tips in this article are good starting points for regulating your nervous system, but this is only the tip of the iceberg. Therapy, acupuncture, meditation, EMDR, yoga, investing in healthy relationships, and building in time for self-care are all strategies our pelvic floor physical therapists use personally. Regulating your nervous system can be a journey. Be kind to yourself as you work on figuring out your best solutions.

Is your body holding tension from being stuck in a nervous system response?
At Well + Core, all of our pelvic floor physical therapists are trauma-informed and dedicated to compassionate care. If you think you may be suffering from tight pelvic floor muscles, incontinence, pain with sex, or other pelvic floor dysfunctions as a result of trauma or simply being stressed out, we’d love to meet you.

If you’re looking for a pelvic floor physical therapist in Kansas City, give us a call or schedule an appointment today.